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I know that Candace Parker is 6’4 and 175 lbs and probably can shoulder press me over her head, but she is still hot and i would love to father her children.  Who doesn’t want to climb up a woman to make love?  Given that I am a 5’10 skinny asian boy that recently went on his first date, she would probably dominate me in bed.  Well as you know, everybody loves an aggressive girl.  Studies have shown that 50% of the time 100% of guys love aggressive girls.  I feel that girls should exploit this and become as aggressive as possible, thus fulfilling my potential to get laid.  Maybe if girls were more aggressive they would be winning the McDonald’s All-American dunk contest with their “eyes closed.”


When it comes to celebrity girls, I usually understand that I don’t have a chance, BUT with Candace I feel I have a legitimate shot.  After all she is marrying Sheldon “the blow-fish” Williams.


The contrast makes me want to claw my eyes out.  On another note, I guarantee that other players tell Anthony Parker they want to bang his sister when they are drunk.

Candace Parker Dota comparison: Drow Ranger

  • lethal and hot in a dark and disturbingly weird way
  • has the potential to carry
  • has both agility and range

For those of you who do not understand, Dota is a video game that is similar to basketball.



  1. I think I’d like to take his place. I can make her happy! Boy, she’s a great athlete!

  2. definitely

  3. Hay this is Jessica. I like your site in all but yall crazy. I like how you use thoes pic. but its all good my nigga!!!


  5. o snap

One Trackback/Pingback

  1. By Ummm… « Live from the Big Apple on 22 Sep 2009 at 5:23 pm

    […] blogs and it seems like a good forum to let out some thoughts on random stuff such as why candace parker is hot and the epic battle that is Jersey Shore traffic. Hopefully I will find time to update this and […]

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