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Every year only one “holiday” recognizes extreme inebriation as a virtue. The color green (my favorite) is obnoxiously hip-thrusted into your face as people get up as early as 10 am to enjoy a nice helping of Vodka for breakfast.  Sounds like my kind of day.  My past St. Patrick’s Day celebrations have been much too tame as I always end up puking too early or had a test or paper to write the day of or the day before.  Some of my friends have neglected their test(s) and/or essay(s) in tribute to this glorious day.  I, however, did not have the stones to support these types of decisions.

This year will be different.  I am going to go apeshit, no holds bar, unadulterated, and most importantly blackout drunk.  How? you may ask.  Well the answer is simple, wake up with a hearty breakfast of beer and have some delicious beer for dessert.  This formula is foolproof.

This year is gonna be my breakout year, my “coming of drunken age.”  Hopefully there will be some interesting stories that arise from this sloppy affair.  I may even hook up with “the coveted” hot white girl.  o.O

drinkbeer9 +   clover_071 =         7

Dear Liver,

I’m sorry for the ensuing pain.  Please do not fail.

Love,

Andrew

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